Wednesday, November 4, 2009, 10:13 PM CST
[General]
Wow, today started out rough. My BG has been so high for several weeks. Occasionally it'll sneak down below 200 just to tease me, but, not for long. My fasting BG this morning was 287, where do you from there, except up, right? So, I went to work feeling really discouraged.
I came into the empty office, dropped my stuff on my desk, started to boot up my computer and decided it would be ok for me to throw myself a pity party. After all, I was alone, no one would see me being less-than-stoic and upbeat. I sighed heavily and then I heard it.
Nicole Mullin-Call on Jesus
Weary brother
Broken daughter Widowed, widowed lover You're not alone If you're tired and scared of the madness around you If you can't find the strength to carry on
But when I call on Jesus All things are possible I can mount on wings like eagles and soar When I call on Jesus Mountains are gonna fall 'Cause He'll move heaven and earth to come rescue me when I call
Call Him in the mornin' In the afternoon time Late in the evenin' He'll be there When your heart is broken And you feel discouraged You can just remember that He said He'll be there
Our office is sublet to a Christian organization called Integrity Foundation. The president of the foundation was sitting in the conference room, affectionately known as the "War Room," just outside my cubicle. . just minding his own business, working on something, listening to music on Pandora. This song was randomly chosen by some virtual DJ who probably doesn't even like the song.
I lost it
Right there, at my desk
Blubbering like a baby.
I went in to thank him for following whatever promptings he had felt that morning that had led him into that space. He didn't know why, he just didn't want to work in his office this morning. He wanted the space to spread out, or something and decided to park himself in the conference room.
I needed to hear that song, I also needed to hear his heart. I told him about my discouragement and he began to share his story with me.
His son has autism and was undergoing treatment and doing well. But, there was a 2 week period in which dad was in S. Africa speaking at a conference. Son was home with mom and underwent some of the most frightening days he'd ever experienced. His temper was raging and mom couldn't seem to get control. Dad was unreachable for a whole week. . it was horrible. On his way to the airport, he stopped to buy the kids some souvenirs and bumped into a gentleman he had met at the conference. This man said to him, you know, the other day, I just felt like we weren't finished talking. What's going on with you and your family?
Dad proceeded to share the story of his son's struggle, the rage, the fear. This man happened to work with natural remedies and Dad just asked. . do you know of anything that could help my son? The man answered. . nothing in the USA, but here in S Africa. He gave him samples to try and low and behold, the son has been great ever since.
This isn't a story about natural medicine or autism or any of that. To me it's this: Be Available.
God may want to work some miracle through you, speak to someone's pain through you, paint his fingerprints on someone's heart through you.
Nicole Mullin didn't know the lives that would be touched, the fear that would be calmed, the anger that would be denied, when she wrote that song.
My friend didn't know what impact he would have on me today, just by sitting in another chair this morning.
But, they did as they felt prompted and my mood, my fear, my anger, my discouragement changed.
Thank you to all those unknowing servants, who follow their hearts and bring healing to mine.
Your song touched my heart when I was saw the words *widow* and *widow Lover. I had lost two husbands in less than five years. My husband Paul and I were married 27 1/2 years
when he dropped dead in front of the family and me. Later I married my husband Steven.
He died one week short of our first anniversary. I didn't think I could go on after that and I never felt so very alone.
I wish I had heard that song a long time ago, but I understand it now.
My Hal is a widower and I am a widow twice over. Maybe God, in his mercy, has blessed
us one more time in this life.
Thank you again. I know my response isn't about diabetes.
I love to read your "Attitude of Gratitude" posts. They are an excellent reminder that it's not circumstance but how you look at it that governs your own happiness and success. Very uplifting. Thank you.
Thank you for reading and more importantly commenting on my post. It is VERY encouraging and humbling to hear that I too may have been that Unknowing Servant I wrote about.
It's a small world and each of us plays a part in each other's journey. Whether we lead the way and call back to where the pitfalls may be, we join hands and help carry each other when needed, or maybe we're following just behind someone else whispering in their ear, "you can do this."
Thanks Barbra for sharing tour story. When I first read it I could not comment right away. The feelings were too strong and I needed to have a cry and regroup. We all have been touched by someone with their knowing what they have passed on to you. When we open our hearts we can be more than mere flesh. We can be the banks of a river that flows pure. That sweet water of healing grace which washes our spirit and all we touch clean.
Many blessing for you and those you touch each day. Your friend always.
Wonderful story, thank you.
Renata12:33 AM CST